I don't feel good.

I feel tired and just plain...yuck.

And yet...I feel closer to God right in this moment then I have for the last couple of days. God has given me the gift of His peace.

One year ago I was counting down the days 'til my wedding. I was also counting down the days 'til my grandma's surgery. She found out just a few months before that she had cancer and needed to have it removed. She had surgery 2 weeks before my wedding and 2 weeks after my wedding she died. My memories of my wedding will always be clouded with a little bit of sadness. I talked to her for the last time when Dennis and I got to our hotel after the wedding. I'm so thankful for that conversation. At the time, I didn't think it was necessary to call her but Dennis said I should. Not long after that she was too sick to talk at all.

Six months after her death, my grandpa fell in love again and started dating. He's supposed to get married in August. I found out yesterday that he has a tumor in his sinuses...we're not sure yet if its cancerous or not. Its scary and yet I know that no matter what happens, God is in control. Peace.

Please pray. I think satan is using memories of a year ago to keep my family from thinking on the positive side.

Carolina Springs is an Acadamy for troubled kids from all over the country. My church has been involved in helping there...specifically my in-laws, and my husband and I are starting to get involved.....but that really has nothing to do with my story.

Yesterday afternoon, one of the boy's dorms caught on fire at the acadamy. There was an electrician working in the attic and they think it was something to do with that. The boys were just coming in from class and their instructor smelled smoke and told them to "get out now!" Just a coupld seconds after the boys all got out, the roof was engalfed in flames. The boys lost everything they owned in just a couple minutes.

I saw very quickly that God uses devastating things to bring us closer to Him. While the fire fighters were putting out the fire, the boys were sitting in a cicle several yards away singing praises, praying and counting they're blessings. And many boys accepted Christ right then. I heard nermerous boys say something like "I lost __________ but I just thank God we're all alive!"

One boy even told my Father-in-law that what he's sad about the most is his Bible. Wow! I had to go over my priorities right there!

Those boys may have started out "troubled," but I think after yesterday, they have it more together then alot of other people.